Browsing "Reflections"

Aspiring Minimalist!

Hello, hope you are doing well in’sha’Allah! I have just updated my blog with some diary entries I wrote 10 years ago!! I attended the University of Bristol Sutton Trust programme for Medical Sciences and I thought I would type it up because I enjoyed reading it! It is under the archives for July 2010 if you’d like to have a read. I am trying to move away from having lots of paper in terms of notes and generally, so I may be adding lots more random bits to the blog.

Recently, me and Anam started clearing out the ‘study room’ because we no longer use it as a study, and it has just become a big storage room. We have got some paint and accessories, so hopefully the room will be done soon, I think the hardest part was getting everything out and organising, donating, disposing or recycling it! It has been so tiring and we are still organising the last few bits and pieces. I have decided to try and become more minimal, I don’t want to have thousands of items which need to be organised regularly, or piles and piles of random notebooks and bits of paper lying around. I may still make handwritten notes when I attend events, but I would like to type them up as well, because it is easier to find them online and I don’t have to have lots of place to store them. I am trying to get myself to a point where I have a good reference system, perhaps on iCloud, with all my notes from classes. Do you think I should share my notes on the blog or just keep them personal?

I have also started a few SeekersGuidance classes to get myself back into the studying mode and learn more about Islam. I have set myself a goal to keep learning and implementing. I remember doing some of these classes years ago, maybe more than 8 years ago?! The website has changed so much, it is amazing! There are soooo many courses to choose from – with reputable scholars and teachers, you can go at your own pace, and it is completely free! I have been making notes on my iPad and just listening to one class a day before bed. I am really loving and enjoying it! I feel so distant due to lockdown, with not being able to attend gatherings in the Masjid, but Alhamdulillah SeekersGuidance is a gem, an absolutely amazing resource! I would really reccommend you check it out!

I am now going to look through my old Arabic notes, of which I have a TON, and I need to sort out what I’d like to keep and what I can recycle. It’s going to be a bit of a journey to get where I want to be in terms of minimalism, but I am excited for it! Also, prayers for my best friend to come back quickly, because I miss him too much 🙁

Until next time!


Eid al-Adha Mubarak

I should be asleep by now, but really wanted needed to write. The blessed 10 days of Dhul-Hijjah have passed, and it is Eid! Eid is a joyous occasion that Allah has blessed us with, and we are very thankful to Him for every blessing He has bestowed on us. It is the Eid of sacrifice. Not only is it the sacrifice of a goat, a sheep or a cow, but the sacrifice of our desires. How often do we reflect on our egos which have grown far too large? How often are we checking ourselves and learning about the major and the minor sins we are committing? Have we become too complacent? Our dinner parties gather many, our Quran and Dhikr gatherings are small and few. What are we really here for? Yes, Allah is Most Merciful, and Forgiving, but come on, we have to do our part!

The moon and the clouds on the night of Eid. We sat outside in the garden for hours, enjoying the cool breeze. It was the hottest day of the year today! During daylight it was SO HOT outside, and in the evening it was so hot inside!

This Eid I really missed my Aunt. It was the first Eid since she has passed. I can’t get my head around it, but it’s true. And the truth is painful. But I’m only human. Difficult times will pass by too…

This year has been difficult, no doubt. For everyone. So many things have been put into perspective. Covid-19 has literally changed the entire world. Something so minute that it can’t even be seen, and the entire world has come to a stand. Allah is the One who is in control, no matter how much anyone may deny it. Could we have even imagined something like this would happen and affect the entire world as it has?

I’ve been reflecting on so much. Praying that everything works out well, that Allah eases all difficulties, and averts all calamities. May Allah give us all eternal happiness, ameen!

The Reality of Life

I haven’t posted for a while. Truth is, I’ve been struggling. Times are challenging, confusing and scary.

5 days ago, my beloved Aunt (eldest phupo) unexpectedly and suddenly passed away. She wasn’t unwell, she wasn’t old. Her heart just stopped. It was her time to go, and there was nothing anyone could do to stop it.

These past few days have been especially difficult. I haven’t been able to put into words my feelings. The sudden shock, and realisation that we could leave this world at any time and any place. Of course, I knew that before, and I have felt it before. But new wounds are raw. And we find ourselves having to start healing all over again.
I know that my Phupo is in a better place. I know that she was a wonderful woman of exemplar character. Everyone who knew her loved her. She tried to make everyone feel loved. She wanted everyone to be happy, to laugh, to enjoy life. She never got angry or raised her voice. Her faith in God was firm. She wasn’t scared of death, and she didn’t need to be. She left so peacefully without a single sigh of pain or emotion, shortly after the Adhan for Fajr, her state as a traveller. She came from the UK as a visitor and passed away in Pakistan. Her mother left her 28 years ago, and her yearning to be with her mother was intense. And now, she is buried besides her.
I would appreciate if you could pray a Fatiha and Surah Ikhlas X3 for my Aunty, so that she may be rewarded. May Allah have mercy on her soul, forgive her for her shortcomings, and grant her Jannah al-Firdaus. Ameen.

This photograph is what I believe to be the last sunset my Aunt had witnessed.